well, this is where stuff on my mind is now i guess!
(18/2/23)ugh i cant even figure out how to change the backround color. i need more time for this :'( (i kinda figured out how to change the font tho? i think? it looks different but i hav no idea what i did)
still cant figure out anything but im just gonna try putting some pretty images from my pinterest then
ugh i have to finish my stupid homework >:(( id rather keep figuring out like. background colors but alas
omg now you can write something here! (it doesnt actually do anything but you can)
AYYYY FIGURED OUT WHAT WAS WRONG WITH MY CSS FILE NOW I CAN CHANGE COLORS!!!!
(25/2/23)hiiii im baaack :D . im. kinda sick but i was so looking forward to messing with this site again
(26/2/23)couldnt sleep all night but at least my brain isnt pulp anymore so lets goo
reading up on HLS. radians in colors. i want to start killing, i didnt almost fail math for this
(1/3/23)hii im (mostly) back from the dead. probably wont change anything significant today tho
(7/3/23) haha cleaning this site up doesnt mean i wont also clutter it more with meaningless updates lmao.
anyways i am super bored and trying to force myself to do some overdue work but. well.
css has been a pain in the ass today but i think i figured it out.
(8/3/23) had a busy day today, came back home, took an awful 1h30 nap, watched an episode of supernatural.
why am i even sharing this
why do i keep having problems with the neocities css file this is soso annoying
okay im getting better i think. man, css is so much less intuituve for me than html. but its fine, im gonna get through this and have a banging website!
(9/3/23) oughh im so boredd... also been thinking about making a spacehey profile but idk.
god this is really turning into a very messy personal blog huh. this was only a matter of time tbh
oh for fucks sake why is css all messed up again work with me man
(10/3/23) blergh, feeling tired for no reason. BUT!!!! MCR concert is tomorrow (today for some probably) and i am so excited!!!
(11/3/23) well the concert was... something. I am still shaking
god i hate school so much this day was so unproductive and i am so behind it scares me
(14/3/23) schools's been mauling me to death lately so i have almost no time to do anything except trying to not crash and burn
and when i do have the time im watching Supernatural. sorry, i have bad priorities
WAITT actually there's something cool i have to share and its this Thursday primer. I've been kinda getting into them lately and also I just really
love reading primers <3<3<3 (i need to know everything about bands i'm just awfuly nosy)
(15/3/23) schoolcrush will continue until may probably.
i am so tired but let this be a lesson to everyone else: manage your time well and dont take advanced french in school
(17/3/23) weekend finally!!! still have to do more schoolwork than it is possible tho :/
but for now i can realx a bit
great so the thursday primer link i tried putting in the primers section just links back to vampire-cities for no reason?
i will take care of this another time, at least the link from (14/3/23) works correctly
(18/3/23) trying to study but im so booooooredddd i wanna fix the layout of this site not learn french conjugation >:((((
the good thing is i will be watching mcr concert tomorrow again:)
(19/3/23) i just think that. my chemical romance forever and ever
i was in so much shock after the show i literally had to take a walk. focusing on work today is a challenge
yeah no the truth is. i did not focus on work today at all. but i fixed links in the primer section! everything should now be working correctly
(i cannot believe how stupid the mistake i made was but its fine now so it doesnt matter)
(20/3/23) ugh this day could've gone better. didn't even get to see todays concert and just look how much i've missed like HELLO???
(oh my god im so sorry this photo is so big and i have no idea how to resize it but it absolutely has to stay i will fix it later)
(21/3/23) was supposed to study a lot more today but accidentaly took a 2h nap (i think it was 2h but im not sure). oh well, these are the effects of sleeping 4h at night (also because i had to study). school sucks lmao im sorry for this but i need to be a little edgy today. as a treat
(22/3/23) yeah so the bad news is i have soso much work again. the good news is its the 10th mcr breakup anniverary and just. sometimes our timeline is really the best one :')
friday i have to put some buttons on here and mess around with layout again. i miss actually programming
(23/3/23) well, i guess writing here is becoming a bit of a habit for me. for no reason tbh.
but, as we all know thats not important! what IS imortant is that "so much (for) stardust" comes out tomorrow!!! i cant wait!!!
watched spn and fucked around all evening instead of studying for an important test tomorrow. it is now 1 am and in aproximately 11 hours we will be finding out
(24/3/23) hello! so, it turned out smfs dropped not at 5pm as ive expected but 1am, literal minutes after i've finished writing in here. which meant an instant listening session until 2am. man, i am not getting sleep lately.
Anyways the whole album is so good! its amazing how fall out boy experiments so much with their style (this is a completely different album than mania) yet you can always tell that a song is theirs seconds after it starts playing. heaven, iowa is my absolute favorite from this album.
In other news, as promised, its buttons and blinkies friday! time to learn what im actually supposed to do to get them on here!
update: i did it! buttons and blinkies are here, this site looks so much cooler now!
holy shit i am now officialy addicted to them they are so fun!
(26/3/23) i can't believe i failed french again this is so stupid. i studied for a week for this and only got 28% what is this bullshit
as you might've noticed this site only covers two topics - my personal struggles with school and music. And since we've covered school today already its time for music stuff!
Im talking about the last concert of MCR's tour obviously. I FINALLY SAW FAMOUS LAST WORDS LIVE THE CURSE IS BROKEN! this tour has changed me and my life so much honestly, and i can't wait for mcr5 (i know nothing is confirmed yet but come on this is obviously not the end)
(27/3/23) ive made a blinkie!!! Something happened to the quality when i tried to save frames as .jpgs so its really blurry but if i figure out whats the problem i might uplod a cleaner version (it says "free blood" btw i know its not really readable). i probably should do my homework now but this was really fun! (also everyone can use it no credit needed tho i have no idea who would want to use this blurry-ass test blinkie except for me)
(28/3/23) so. schoolcrush doesnt let me ignore itself which is totally fine (it isnt and im shaking from all the caffeine currently in my blood). only 3 more months and i am free, everything will work out and i will be free, summer is coming and it will save us all
(29/3/23) okay i really shouldn't waste more time today than i did already (especially when i have nothing to say) but goddd i dont want to study so baddd :'(((((
(1/4/23) im BAAAAACKKK!!! my school organizes this theater festival anually and this year i finally decided to help in it! last 2 days i spent over 12h straight at school every day but i'm so happy i helped create something so amazing! i was in charge of the cloakroom which might seem kinda boring but it was a lot of work and i've met some really nice ppl. honestly, hs might suck but the people here make it bearable (most of them at least)
(2/4/23) made a "this user hates french conjugation" blinkie out of spite. figured out how to save .pngs so they dont get all crusty and barely readable, might add a clean freeblood blinkie later. also they are so small i might start making them a bigger size. sorry 90's authenticity but i cant see shit when the image im looking at 20x150 pixels
(3/4/23) anxiety's been eating me today and ive been told i have to retake an exam tomorrow (the one i got 28% from) and i didnt study for it AT ALL. so yeah, fun times. but we're still kickin and thats what counts
(4/4/23) should be making notes for chemistry exam tomorrow but. well. instead i started writing a rant about tiktok and just social media in general that kinda started turning into a tumblr commercial but like. my general point is - delete tt and as many other social medias you can without completely falling out of your social circles and make a website instead. or just enjoy an internetless existence.
but staying on the topic of websites and programming - i sometimes look through some tags on neocities and its so sad to see abandoned barely or not-at-all touched sites still with the standard white background and neocities layout. i dont mean this in like a bad way, more like a "a few months ago this might as well have been me" way (is this a correct grammar sturcture? i cant tell). and im still not fully satisfied with this site but i love going on here and seeing all the code i wrote and dreaming about other cool features ill put here. sorry, im rambling again about the same thing i always do but also not really sorry because thats my site and i can do whatever i want
update: it is now almost 1 am and instead of studying ive been fucking around on tumblr and i started writing?? my desire to create is very much killing any chance of my academic success
(6/4/23) first day of Easter break! i was so ready to realx yesterday evening and do all the things i never have time to do but i went out with some friends after school and after i got back i just went straight to sleep. i slept for 13 hours, missed 4 alarms and for the first time in months i feel truly well-rested. so now (procrastinating schoolwork again) i decided to clean my room. it's always so messy and i dont really like that but i never have the time to clean it and when i do i'm so satisfied. you can actually see more than 15% of the floor now!
(7/4/23) ugh, trying to study today and its sooo boring. i kinda feel like im getting the general hang of it but i cant really trust my jugement on this considering im still technically failing french. i really hope im right tho, i have to finally get something right or else im not gonna pass this year ant that would suck beyond human understanding.
i also dyed my hair today (and a lot of my skin in the process :D) it came out jet black, as always. this is so annoying tbh, i want to go even darker like, imagine having vantablack hair. i know i sound very edgy but this would really look so fucking cool
update: look, im trying to read up on css (which i do not like at all) and i appreciate mdn so much for making programming tutorials that i actually understand but if i see fucking veggies es bonus vobis one more time im shooting my laptop straight through the screen
(8/4/23) FUCK THIS why am i expected to study over Easter break. Its 6 days so not even a full week off and i cant even take my mind off school anyways. i am soo behind (as always) and really hope some fucking french god comes to bless me soon because i am so not passing this year without divine intervention. or just smite my teacher, that could also help
(10/4/23) well, after the initial 13 hours of sleep for easter break my body decided to fuck me over again and for the past few days i've been falling asleep after 3am. Easter was good tho!<3
i promise i am more a lover than a hater but another bad thing is that my touchpad isn't working and thats so annoying! and this is a new laptop too, why are you doing this!?!?!
update: OHMYGOD. honeslty if anyones reading this sorry, you must think i'm an idiot by now. i just wasted a considerable amount of time trying to find a solution to my not working touchpad and it turns out there is a fucking stupid key on my keybord that turns it on and off and i didnt realize?? i was about to reinstall drivers for fucks sake!
(12/4/23) first day back at school and i am already so tired, but it wasnt all bad. I am kinda procrastinating badly rn, but it's by reading a potential primer i might add to the primer list and trying to push myslef to read up on css. That one is kinda tricky tho because i want to read it after i finish studying but i need to start studying first and i dont want to. but damn i cant wait for summer to roll around i will finally finish undertale! i miss that game
(18/4/23) been kinda absent from here i know. nothing really happened, just been busy with schoolwork and didn't really feel the need to write tbh. just popping in to say that i'm fucking up my sleep schedule again and that i'll try doing stuff around here soon probably. untill then!
(28/4/23) hah, a lot has been happening lately and most of it has been good. my life is starting to actually be okay and i'm really happy. i'm going with my friends on a trip for 3 days in early may, and i might get a summer job. I mean, life isn't still without it's bumps but it's mostly good.
(11/6/23) damn i sure as hell hve been inactive on here. but yeah, the early may trip was awesome and i just came back from another trip, this one organised by my english teacher. it was a sailing trip and the sailing itself was great, but i haven't felt so alienated since middle school. 40 students and not a single one of them was into the same stuff i am, not even a single hobby. so that kinda sucked, but it was mostly fine.
in other news, i've started writing fanfiction on ao3, might put a link here at some point and (thanks to a certain mutual) started reading "Maurice" and its sooo good honestly everyone go read it right now!